The Right Defines Family Values Over a Stack of Waffles

Did you miss the Values Voters Summit last weekend? I did too. It’s a shame too, because I was so looking forward to hearing how values centered Americans vote and see the world. I don’t know about you, but I need to get my head screwed on straight with good old American values. I really need to get better about putting important events in that calendar gizmo in my phone.

The summit was hosted and organized by socially conservative public policy groups American Values and Focus on the Family. The always entertaining James Dobson was there, as was Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney – the first time a Newt and a Mitt ever spoke at the same event, I’m sure.

The summit was a treasure trove of values based discussion groups like the mentally stimulating workshop on how the Jews are responsible for the manufacturing and burying of all those so-called “dinosaur bones”. There was also a workshop on options for the relocation of gay Americans to a string of islands off the coast of Guam. Perhaps none of the events were more popular than ‘In the Kitchen with Sarah’, where the Republican VP nominee whipped up a few recipes that no conservative dinner table should be without, including, ‘Bridge to Nowhere Beef Brisket’ and ‘Troopergate Tacos’.

Of course, I kid the Republicans! All of that is just a joke. Just a little fun poking at the policies of the far right. Besides, they would never allow a recipe for tacos at one of their events. Tacos, it turns out, are Mexican.

But one of the items sold at the event was no joke. It was quite popular too. ‘Obama Waffles’. Without the aid of the box, it might sound like a clever jab at Obama’s possible shifting on any given issue. However, when you see the box, there is no denying the intent. A cartoon Obama is featured on the front with bulging eyes and thick lips. Perhaps its an homage to the old school, Aunt Jamima, the loveable slave who just loved cookin’ up flapjacks for white folks.

As insanely offensive as the front of the box is, the box top is even worse. It shows Barack Obama in a Muslim headdress beside a label that says, “Point box toward Mecca for tastier waffles”.

Now as if that weren’t enough, the back of the box is fun too. Obama is depicted in stereotypical Mexican dress, including a sombrero, above a recipe for "Open Border Fiesta Waffles" that says it can serve "4 or more illegal aliens." The recipe includes a tip: "While waiting for these zesty treats to invade your home, why not learn a foreign language?" Isn’t that cute?

What is clear in this and with most every Republic attack in a campaign where it is in their best interest to avoid any and all issues is that the difference in their attacks compared to those of the Democrats is that the right is not at all squeamish when it comes to getting personal. Not just personal, but personal and dishonest. The brilliant part of this approach is that while they roar forward, they also any questioning of Sarah Palin’s policies or experience is somehow personal or sexist. Classic!

One last note. As this article is being published, the website from the summit's organizer, frcaction.org has removed all of its content on the summit. Now, I better close this up now, I’m hungry for a Lipstick on a Pig Pork Sandwich.